Jofef Stalin INterview
By Oisin Galvin
Before the interview we conducted some proir reserch about his past and early life as to not get exicuted for bad mouthing Uncle Joe.
He was born into a poor household , his mother a housekeeper and father a alchaolic cobbler. He was plauged with sickness and injuries including a broken arm that has rendered his arm stiffer and shorter than the other. He also suffered from smallpox which casts a scar on his face to this day. During middle school he was expelled for goig on a rampage in the process assaulting police officer, even with this he got a scollarship to Tiflis Spiritual Seminary a gorgrean orthodox seminary . According to solviet biographies he was expelled for having pro comminist views but the schools clams that he was expelled for missing finals.
Before the interview we conducted some proir reserch about his past and early life as to not get exicuted for bad mouthing Uncle Joe.
He was born into a poor household , his mother a housekeeper and father a alchaolic cobbler. He was plauged with sickness and injuries including a broken arm that has rendered his arm stiffer and shorter than the other. He also suffered from smallpox which casts a scar on his face to this day. During middle school he was expelled for goig on a rampage in the process assaulting police officer, even with this he got a scollarship to Tiflis Spiritual Seminary a gorgrean orthodox seminary . According to solviet biographies he was expelled for having pro comminist views but the schools clams that he was expelled for missing finals.
So how did you come to government?
I started reading Lennons work in the seminary, in fact that is the reason I was expelled. His work inspired me to become a Marxist and later join the Bolsheviks. My job in the Bolsheviks was to organize strikes and spread uh....[pauses momentary to think of the word] the news of our efforts and encourage others. I was arrested at some points and they tried to put me up for service but uh...[again pauses to choose his words a carefully] I had problems with my arm at the time. Good thing too if I was shot in the war who knows what this country would be without me. Anyway, where was I? [ try to answer his question but he continues before I can even speak] O yes, The Great War, well durung it myself and my revolutionaries we organized uprisings and revolutions against the empire. We captured Winter Palace and then later the western front, they where a tough city to listen, we had to burn down thier crop and have a few executions before they would listen. After that I became a commander in the Polish soviet war. I uess I was good enogh for lenon to appoint me General Secretary of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union
I started reading Lennons work in the seminary, in fact that is the reason I was expelled. His work inspired me to become a Marxist and later join the Bolsheviks. My job in the Bolsheviks was to organize strikes and spread uh....[pauses momentary to think of the word] the news of our efforts and encourage others. I was arrested at some points and they tried to put me up for service but uh...[again pauses to choose his words a carefully] I had problems with my arm at the time. Good thing too if I was shot in the war who knows what this country would be without me. Anyway, where was I? [ try to answer his question but he continues before I can even speak] O yes, The Great War, well durung it myself and my revolutionaries we organized uprisings and revolutions against the empire. We captured Winter Palace and then later the western front, they where a tough city to listen, we had to burn down thier crop and have a few executions before they would listen. After that I became a commander in the Polish soviet war. I uess I was good enogh for lenon to appoint me General Secretary of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union
What did you want to change in the government?
Well after Lenin died and I wanted to do what was best for the country , which as any modern nation would agree is through industrialization but I also centralized the government for better control. Like I said we did what was best for the country and its people and at one point that was ridding the farmers of their food and land so it would be put t better use, I don't understand why only few understood that. And then I needed to get rid of any opponents that might make my peoples life worse.
Well after Lenin died and I wanted to do what was best for the country , which as any modern nation would agree is through industrialization but I also centralized the government for better control. Like I said we did what was best for the country and its people and at one point that was ridding the farmers of their food and land so it would be put t better use, I don't understand why only few understood that. And then I needed to get rid of any opponents that might make my peoples life worse.
So what is Communism exactly?
[momentarily pauses to think] Communism is the was the world would be run, the government system of tomorrow the result of all our new inventions in the government field. Communism is all of these things combined With our communism we live free of ownership and classes, we are all equals, we all benefit from the fruits of our labour equally. We the government own everything so there is no need for you to meddle with these matters or make classes over the ownership of anything. With this idea we can make a utopia, no need for anything anyone to worry. about anything.
[momentarily pauses to think] Communism is the was the world would be run, the government system of tomorrow the result of all our new inventions in the government field. Communism is all of these things combined With our communism we live free of ownership and classes, we are all equals, we all benefit from the fruits of our labour equally. We the government own everything so there is no need for you to meddle with these matters or make classes over the ownership of anything. With this idea we can make a utopia, no need for anything anyone to worry. about anything.
How did you view Hitler?
Oh! that 4 foot liar. I hate that little Nazi prick. First of all he has a irrational fear of communism, it is after all the superior system, he could have adopted it and I bet I would have liked him more. But when he invaded us after the treaty, UGGGGGGGGGGG [pauses and breathes heavily]. When he invaded us, so traitorous, but he should have known better, you cannot defeat the read army!
Oh! that 4 foot liar. I hate that little Nazi prick. First of all he has a irrational fear of communism, it is after all the superior system, he could have adopted it and I bet I would have liked him more. But when he invaded us after the treaty, UGGGGGGGGGGG [pauses and breathes heavily]. When he invaded us, so traitorous, but he should have known better, you cannot defeat the read army!
How did Communisim affect WWII
Well of course being communists we ran one of the most efficient and controllable systems in the world my great people listen and respond to me like a military, they are great and will do anything for the mother country. But we as communists our people will do whats best for the country not just them, that's why so many lost their food just to defeat the Germans.
Well of course being communists we ran one of the most efficient and controllable systems in the world my great people listen and respond to me like a military, they are great and will do anything for the mother country. But we as communists our people will do whats best for the country not just them, that's why so many lost their food just to defeat the Germans.
- What was the Rise of Fascism and what did you think about it?
- The rise of fascism was the start of the war. Without the fascist governments my self and the other communist governments would have lived our life toward utopia and the capitalist governments would slowly tear themselves apart. The world would be at right with its self. Fascist governments need war as part of their principle, with fascism war is inevitable.
Summary
When I asked Stalin what is communism he explained to me that is a superior system in which wealth is spread equally, there is no property or other wrong capitalist ideas. The goal of communism,as he put it, is to create a utopia, and stalin is well set on doing just so.
When I asked him about Hitler he went on a rant getting quite angry at one point having to cool himself down. In conclusion he stated that he did not like Hitler at all for his less that fair war tactics. He then babbled about the Red Army's strength.
When I asked Stalin how did communism affected WWII he responded that communism being the superior system. He attested that because of the communist system his people where willing to fight to all ends to stop the Nazis. Essentially he said that other systems would not be able to fight as much as a total war as communism is able to.
When I asked Stalin what the rise of fascism was he explained that it was the start of something no good. He believed that fascist governments could not sustain them self without war and therefore led to war.
The original interviews name has been withheld as shortly after after attempting to publish the interview in the USSR was convicted of treason against the government and was sent to a labor camp. I, Oisin Galvin, found the cassete recording and present it to you now in a state free of Stalinist rule.